How to Tell if Your Relationship is Doing One of Three Things

How to Tell if Your Relationship is Doing One of Three Things

Have you ever been in a relationship and experienced one of those unexpected moments of revelation?

Perhaps it happened one morning when you and your partner were just waking up, as you blinked groggily at the ceiling — still half-asleep, and suddenly it hit you.

Something feels different between us here…

You’re weren’t entirely sure what was changing in your relationship or what direction it was heading… you were just abruptly aware that something was shifting.

Like when a thunderstorm is brewing, and you can taste the electricity in the air but you can’t be 100% sure when or if the lightning will strike.

Palpable, yet not quite tangible.

Well, fear no more, because there’s a simple way to tell if your relationship is doing one of three things, and I’m going to share it with you.

It’s quite clear really. As your relationship shifts, it will be doing one of three things: it will revolve, evolve, or dissolve.

Sounds very ‘natural selection’, right? Stick with me, because this information is important.

Revolve

When a relationship revolves, it’s doing just that — revolving. Not moving forwards or going backwards, but stuck in a repetitive cycle with you and your partner dead at the centre.

For example, if your relationship reaches this stage, you will find yourself arguing about the same thing over and over and over again.

Be that arguments over household chores, overbearing in-laws, money concerns, time spent working or out with friends rather than at home… It could be about anything, but the conversation goes round in circles, and nothing is ever resolved.

This cycle repeats for years and years and years, untileventually you feel like you’re trapped in a budget verion of Groundhog Day where you’re the main star.

And, I’m sorry to say but in five years time, you’re going to be having the same version of that argument. About a different topic, perhaps, but look closely and you’ll realise that it’s the same exact argument you’ve already had a million and one times.

Yawn.

You’ll be barraged by so many moments of deja vu that you could recite your lines and exit stage right like you’re reading from a script.

So when your relationship feels repetitive, predictable and unchanging that is when it revolving.

Evolve

The second way a relationship changes is that it evolves.

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This is when you and your partner are able to push beyond the petty emotional nonsense of the revolving emotional states, and both of your consciousness and your partner’s consciousness is ready to reach a new level of love and understanding.

You recognise that you don’t want to spend all day everyday arguing over who put a green sock in with the whites wash, and instead you begin to take control of your emotional life.

You redirect your gaze inwards, taking a deeper look and asking yourself: what level of love and understanding or gratitude and care do I actuallywant to feel with my partner? How will it look and what will it sound like? How will it feel?

You are super switched on and aware of yourself and your partner, and know exactly what it is that you both want from your relationship.

Likewise, you are both ready to reach that next level, no longer choosing to live in the past by clinging onto the old and familiar. Instead you’re eager to embrace a new kind of intimacy and understanding of one another.

All these are indicators that the relationship is in the process of evolving.

So a relationship can either revolve or evolve, but not both. Right?

Think of it like you’re in a three-legged race with your partner; you have to work in unison to take that step forward. This simply won’t happen if one person wants to stand still, or better yet, run in a completely different direction.

Dissolve

Which brings us onto our third and final way a relationship can change, and this is when it dissolves.

A relationship dissolves because several things have broken down or weakened, namely: communication, sexual contact, a meeting of intellects, agreement and cohesion, and intimacy.

And the root cause of this is easy to identify… you, my friend!

It’s because you’ve forgotten yourself in the relationship; you lost sight of your values and what is important to you, the individual, as you became utterly absorbed in being part of ‘the couple’.

We all know those couples, don’t we? Tomkat, for example. But look what happened there! No more jumping on sofas for Tom Cruise anytime soon, no siree.

Yet there’s a solution, a way to stop yourself slipping and sliding down that slope, to the point where your relationship breaks up. It’s YOU reclaiming your individuality, your values and goals. However, if you are notwilling to take yourself back, then know that the relationship will dissolve.

Perhaps you’re now realising that your relationship is either stuck in the revolve cycle or is actually dissolving. Pause! No need to freak out. We’ve created a webinar to help you resolve this issue, which you can access by clicking the link below:

http://www.mjbseminars.com.au/healthy-relationships

So, overall, what have we gleaned here?

Well, when you are able to identify what stage your relationship has reached, you then have the power to engage and shape it into how you really, truly want it to be.

If evolution is what you seek, then it’s important for you and your partner to be on the same wavelength, to be singing from the same lyric sheet… whatever cliché you can think of . The essence remains: when you share the same vision, but you both remember to remain true to yourself and your values, then your relationship will be able to progress and grow.

If you are aware that your relationship is either revolving or dissolving, and want to be proactive in changing this, then you are now empowered with knowledge and choice.

This is your life and your relationship. The next move is yours to make.

FREE Webinar: Why Relationships Fail – And How to Ensure YOURS Doesn’t

Discover the REAL SECRET to creating a happy, healthy and long-term relationship.

Even if you’ve had countless failed relationships, or even if you’ve don’t have a partner!

Click here for Instant Access to your FREE Relationships Webinar >>

About Mitch Behan

Mitch Behan, Founder and Director of MJB Seminars, is a master educator in the area of personal transformation. With over 18 years’ experience in the Personal Development industry he has transformed the lives of thousands of people worldwide. He is a passionate, brilliant and talented public speaker that has an innate knowing and ability to whisper to another human soul and awaken the greatness that lies within us all. Mitch is a true teacher renowned for walking his walk and talking his talk.

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